Ananias

(From Acts 9)

My name is Ananias and this is my story. I have told it many times and each time, I pray that the retelling will glorify my Lord, Jesus Christ. Our friend, the Apostle Paul, has testified about me, as he explained to the Jews in Jerusalem about his journey from persecutor of the Way, to Apostle to the Gentiles (Acts 22). His testimony bore witness to what I am about to share with you.

I was living in Damascus at the time. Damascus was, in fact, home to many Jews, most of whom, like me, practiced their faith openly. I was held in good repute among this community, even though I had become a follower of the Way, which was the term we used to identify ourselves as Christ-followers.

Some disciples of Jesus had come to Damascus, preaching the Gospel and baptizing in the name of Jesus. I eagerly embraced their message and was baptized, though not discarding the traditions and practices of my Jewish ancestors, including attending synagogue. Those of us in this new faith community lived quietly, seeking to get along with the broader Damascus population. We sought to be people of peace.

We knew all about Paul, who was at that time known as Saul of Tarsus. He was notorious, a Pharisee who was literally on fire in his attacks on the new believers in Jesus. The earliest note of Saul was of his participation in the stoning of Stephen, one of the first deacons of the church in Jerusalem.

In his zeal, Saul argued with these new believers, threatened them, and when possible, had them arrested and imprisoned by the Council. All of this was done under the watchful eye of the Romans, who acquiesced, believing that Saul was actually assisting them in dealing with troublemakers. In effect, they looked the other way because Saul was saving them the effort of rounding up presumed resistors to Roman rule.

Now, Saul was coming to Damascus, bringing with him the high priest’s authorization to arrest and bind local believers and bring them back to Jerusalem for imprisonment. All of us would be in danger from this fanatical Pharisee. We had no real defense against him.

But of course, Saul’s plans were suddenly changed. In fact, Saul’s entire life was suddenly changed, almost in the blink of an eye. For reasons known only to God, Saul’s life was to be turned from an attacker of the faith to a disciple of it. I can think of no one less likely than Saul to be an apostle of Jesus Christ!

However, that is exactly what happened. Because you see, while Saul was still on the road, approaching Damascus, he was suddenly blinded by a great light. The light was so strong, so brilliant, that it literally knocked Saul from his mount, leaving him sprawled in the dust of the road. 

And then: the voice, a voice unlike any voice he’d ever heard. 

“Saul, Saul, why do you persecute me?” The voice asked.

He asked, “Who are you, Lord?” 

The reply came, “I am Jesus, whom you are persecuting.  But get up and enter the city, and you will be told what you are to do.” 

For a long while, Saul lay in the dust of the road. His companions, who had also heard the voice, tried to get him to his feet. But Saul resisted. He was blind. And what’s more, he simply could not process the message from the voice. It was counter to everything he believed and all he had worked for. All of his energy, his devotion to a cause, and his system of belief, all of that was instantly shattered, lying with him in the dust of the road as shards of a broken vessel.

Though he clearly heard, he could not understand. The message was too alien to his thinking and to what he believed to be his mission. It contradicted everything he knew and all he stood for.

How, in fact, could he be persecuting the one whose voice he heard? Could he have been wrong? Could all of his efforts to stamp out this new faith have been misguided? Could he literally be fighting against the very God he worshipped?

In a daze, Saul got to his feet and allowed his companions to lead him the rest of the way, into the city. His eyesight did not return. Nor did he gain any understanding of what had happened to him. In his physical and emotionally helpless state, all Saul could do was pray. His world had literally been turned upside down!

I, of course, knew nothing of his encounter with our Lord. All of us, the Christ-followers in Damascus, knew only that our bitter enemy had arrived in the city. 

But two nights later I, too, heard a voice. Yes, it was the very same voice heard by Saul, the voice of our Lord Jesus, speaking to me. “Go to the house of Judas on Straight Street,” the voice said, “and ask for a man from Tarsus named Saul, for he is praying. In a vision he has seen a man named Ananias come and place his hands on him to restore his sight.” “Lord,” I bravely answered, “I have heard many reports about this man and all the harm he has done to your holy people in Jerusalem. And he has come here with authority from the chief priests to arrest all who call on your name.”

But the Lord said to me, “Go! This man is my chosen instrument to proclaim my name to the Gentiles and their kings and to the people of Israel. I will show him how much he must suffer for my name.”

So, I went. I was familiar with Judas, and knew his house on Straight Street. I must say that, despite the voice and the command to go, I nevertheless went with some amount of concern. Saul was that fearsome! He was not an adversary to be taken lightly. And I still wondered how our Lord could possibly have chosen him, of all people, to be his disciple. I also wondered if Saul could change his life’s course as dramatically as would be required.

Timidly and carefully entering Judas’ house, I found Saul, still blind, and on his knees, deep in prayer. He had been praying for three days since he heard the voice of Jesus. When I quietly entered, I had to nudge him to make him aware of my presence. I placed my hand gently on his shoulder and introduced myself.

“Brother Saul,” I said, “the Lord—Jesus, who appeared to you on the road as you were coming here—has sent me so that you may see again and be filled with the Holy Spirit.”

That was all. I had no idea how he would react, and I braced for the worst. For a long moment, he looked up at me, blankly, as if in a dream. “Ananias,” he softly said, “I have dreamt of you. You are the one come to restore my sight.”

“Yes, my son,” I replied and at that instant, his sight was restored. Yes, at that very instant. He later said that it felt as if scales were falling from his eyes.

My fear of him was subsiding, though I must admit a shred of it remained. 

Saul then stood up, placed his hands on my shoulders, and without a word, kissed me on the cheek. Yes, he did. Yes, Saul, this man of such passionate hatred, this murderer, this one who had engaged in great evil, was kissing me, Ananias, a follower of Jesus, on the cheek!

Baptism of St. Paul by Anania

Capella Palatina

He asked to be baptized. Though not a priest, I agreed. We found a basin of water and with Saul kneeling, I baptized him in the name of the Father, the Son and the Holy Spirit. 

I confess that as I did, a shiver went through my body. After all, here I was, Ananias, baptizing the greatest persecutor of our faith into that very faith. I could only guess at how Saul’s life would unfold from here.

And now, years later, I can more easily reflect on the events of that day. For you see, Saul did turn his life around. Saul, now Paul, became the greatest missionary, bringing the Gospel of Jesus Christ to the known world. And yes, he did suffer, even to the point of his own death.

What does it all mean? With God, nothing is impossible. That’s for starters. But more: we can be the greatest enemy of God, the greatest persecutor of the faith, and we will not be lost. God can and will redeem us and enlist us in his great mission, to bring the light of Christ to a world in darkness.